Mega Shark vs. Crocosaurus (2010) Reviews

• The Mega Shark returns!!

  stsinger2010-12-26

  After its titanic battle with the Giant Octopus, the world had only one question -- what would happen if the Mega Shark did battle with a 1500 foot giant crocodile? Well, luckily, we know the answer, as "Mega Shark vs Crocosaurus" is finally released! Easily mistaken for a documentary, this film follows a band of intrepid heroes -- an oceanic sound engineer (played by Jaleel White, yup, "Urkel") who knows about sharks, a drunken hunter who knows about crocodiles, and an uptight FBI agent who is also a helicopter pilot and wears a tight tank top -- as they chase the two monsters around the globe. The plot is straightforward; while mining diamonds in the Congo, workers unleash a giant crocodile. Meanwhile, the Mega Shark has returned and apparently finds crocodile eggs indescribably delicious. Thus, the tension between the two beasts. The top-of-the-line special effects will blow your mind as we follow the story from Miami Beach to Orlando to California to the Panama Canal. The Mega Shark is up to its old tricks (eating boats, jumping out of the water to attack planes, etc) and the Crocosaurus will live in your nightmares as you watch it trample through cities. I am certain this film is 100% scientifically accurate, and should be required viewing for anybody who enjoys good, mindless fun and doesn't take things too seriously!

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• Be careful!

  steve9172011-07-10

  After a long time thinking about this movie I came up with two theories about its existence: 1. On some weekend in the early 80's a group of 14-year-olds sneaked into an empty Hollywood studio. Without any clue, script, or skill but a lot of beer and dope they shot this film in a few hours. Afterwards, when sober they figured how disastrous and scary the result was (even for drunk high school kids), and they tried to destroy the tape. But somehow it got into the hands of The Joker who thought it was a powerful weapon of mass destruction if ever published – well, he was wrong, but close. 2. This production was meant to become the worst movie of all time. But it still failed to make it. From the worst movie of all time I definitely expect to have fun watching it. But this one is pure pain – the Joker was not that wrong. If there wasn't two or three actors I recognized from somewhere else I wouldn't have believed that there was a single film professional involved in this "thing". My recommendation: Rather use the 88 minutes it takes to watch it, for reading the newspaper from 4 weeks ago. Afterwards you will regret it less.

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• Megashark faces off against a prehistoric harbinger of poorly rendered destruction

  blackhawx1012011-06-15

  Everybody's favourite Armour-piercing shell proof shark is back, and its not alone. Accompanied by a 1500-foot long prehistoric harbinger of poorly rendered destruction, the Megashark leads a band of intrepid experts and the US Military on a wild and often confusing romp around the globe. The trouble begins when the Megashark finds something more delicious than US Naval Frigates, namely the eggs laid by the Crocosaurus. As the tension rises between the two pinnacles of Computer Generated Imagery, the US Army plots the annihilation of the two animals, conceiving a plan including 'hydro sonic balls', the Panama Canal, and a whole heap of factual ignorance. Masterfully dodging precisely-targeted cruise missiles and torpedoes, the pair rack up a significant body count, managing, it seems, to kill some people more than once, owing to the miracle of re-used footage. When the two beasts finally do battle, the US Military apparently prevail, utilising a rather timely volcanic explosion, leaving the two to descend slowly into the abyss. The corpses are never shown, leaving viewers expecting (and perhaps dreading) a sequel. While it is important to note with this movie that the intention was never to create an action blockbuster, the meta-ironic farce approach the Asylum takes doesn't really do it for this film. Hopefully self-aware, the scripting is clunky, the factual ignorance is inconceivable, and the special effects are non existent. Stuck somewhere between a spoof and a low budget, try-hard blockbuster, this is one to see for those with very low expectations.

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• It was horribly bad, but I enjoyed it

  vampyrecowboy2011-01-05

  Yes, it was ridiculously horribly bad, but some reason, I enjoyed it. The effects looked cheap - because they were, the acting was overdone - maybe on purpose, the soundtrack was horrible, the camera work and editing was bad, the script was at best horrible. So many parts to this movie did not make any sense. So why did I like it? With a title like Mega Shark Vs Crocosaurus, how could you not? So many clips were reused in piecing this scrap together to make a movie. It was so bad on so many levels and so stupid, that it was good for that reason alone. I could only imagine if this had a real budget,. a real script, a real cast and was not the cheap movie that it is...how good would it be? Who would have been in it if it was a Hollywood big budget movie?

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• The Name Says It All

  Gyroshock922011-09-18

  OK, so last night I wanted to treat myself with a low-budget movie. Luckily, Mega Shark vs "Crocosaurus" was on TV the same night. Just by looking at the name of the movie itself, I know I was in for a real cheese fest. The characters really don't go together. You have a skipper whose boat was thrashed by the two beasts, a special agent who has the amazing ability to keep a straight robot-like face without ever giving a smile, then you have one of the crewmen from a aircraft carrier who is also out to destroy the two beasts who have been threatening national security. This crewman (Jaleel White) is the only actor I could recognize throughout the whole film. Man, I thought Jaleel was some kind of big actor or something (I first heard of him when he played in Big Fat Liar). Apparently not. The acting isn't very good and it still amazes me how the actors can keep a straight face with all the cheesiness going on. Here and there you get some okay acting. Near the end, there are so many things going on at the same time. You can't keep track of how many submarines are introduced to you and whether Mega Shark has been killed or just injured Crocosaurus. At one point, I thought Crocosaurus was killed, but then the two creatures were duking it out again. There are so many things wrong in this film. A lot of plot holes, unexplained situations and not to mention, the overall quality of the special effects. I'm not going to hate on the special effects so much as the other people who have also reviewed this film. If I'm not mistaken, this is a direct-to-video film and was probably made by a very small company. You're not suppose to expect decent special effects. I have a few concerns with the special effects though. Any vehicle bigger than a car (a helicopter, plane, ship) is made from CGI, really bad CGI. So don't expect any car chases or fancy flying. Is it really that expensive to rent a helicopter? Mega Shark and Crocosaurus don't look believable at all. There are also a whole lot of reused scenes. The sets are also not very well constructed. Adding a lot of blue LED lights won't make things look more real. Don't get me wrong, this film has the ability to entertain you. You'll witness how a man, after being washed out onto a beach, waves his gun at innocent children and cursing them for no valid reason, you'll see how a enormous shark swallows a nuclear-powered submarine (apparently turning the shark into a "nuclear bomb") in one go and how Mega Shark is propelled into the air by a submarine's missile. Pretty hilarious. If you are willing to turn your mind off for 80 minutes, then I highly recommend this film.

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